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Reset, cut and beyond!
12-15-2013, 05:38 PM
Post: #1
Reset, cut and beyond!
Hi,
I just thought I'd start a little journal, as this is a completely different dietary journey to anything I've done before.

OK, background:
I was an overweight teenager, at 5ft 8ish, I guess I weighed around 85kg (187 pound). I initially lost roughly 10kg (or 22pound) just by light exercise and improving my diet, but without actually going on a 'diet'. But wasn't happy with where I was, and still overweight, thus began ten years of dieting. Weightwatchers on and off, calorie counting, meal replacement shakes, atkins, paleo, sugar free, gluten free, lite n easy meal delivery, and intermittent fasting. I initially lost another 15kg, getting to an all time low of 60kg (about 132 pound). But I still wasn't happy - I was scrawny up top, but still had larger legs than I'd like, and no definition. I thought if I just kept dieting and running I'd lose all the excess weight, even though I was very close to underweight. I started running every day, training for and running two half marathons. Then my thyroid went kaput, and I got back up to 72kg within a matter of months. Then I got my thyroid under control, and that's when I use calorie counting and intermittent fasting to get back down to 60kg.

But it's clear to me now that the reason I was never, and still wasn't, happy with how my body looked is that I lost so much muscle, I'd say less than half what I lost was fat. I also had no energy, no strength, no stamina, and was REALLY struggling to keep to my calories.

I then tried intuitive eating, and gained about 4kg, but the stress of it, and my inability to let go of guilt when eating, was too hard for me. I have a mathematical mind and couldn't help overanalysing every meal.

I then decided to commit 100% to EM2WL - started properly a few days ago. Although I am counting my time intuitively eating as part of my reset, as I know from some quick calcs that I was eating over my TDEE. I've gained another 2kg, so am now +6kg (or 13 pound) above my lowest weight.


I'll be honest, the 13pounds is freaking me out, but I know that if I go back to dieting now, I'll just be proving my body right - at the moment is just waiting for the next diet and starvation period.

I think I am also in that ravenous hunger stage, as I am finding it so so easy to go over my 2500 cal TDEE (which I think is a bit generous anyway!). But I am just going to go with it, as when I try to restrict I tend to binge now anyway. I am hoping it settles. but frankly, it is nice to have permission to eat.

I think that's it?
I probably do too much cardio, so working on slowly letting go of this. I am having a new weights program done for me at the gym, to push me to get stronger. I figure while I am eating so much I may as well capitalise and try and build some muscle while I'm at it!
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12-16-2013, 10:08 AM (This post was last modified: 12-16-2013 10:17 AM by jaeone.)
Post: #2
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
Hi Lucy, good idea starting this thread! We can watch your progress and cheer you on! Keep that positive attitude! Even though you are on a reset, still make good choices and keep your goal in mind! And know eventually, your ravenous state will subside! wink

Joan
Be yourself. Everyone else is taken! kiss

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/jaeone
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12-16-2013, 05:39 PM
Post: #3
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
Thanks! I hope that the reset is mentally the toughest part of the journey, because I saw another kilo on my scales this morning! But at least I think I am at the point where I 'get it'. I.e., at the moment I feel like I am in Catch 22, I know I am probably eating too much even for my reset (like yesterday was more like 2700 than 2500 calories), but I know if I try to restrict, I'll end up binging and just gain faster. So I just need to stick with the plan, and trust that my body will eventually start to self regulate hunger wise...

And I keep thinking, short term 'gain' for long term gain. I couldn't have kept dieting all my life, so this weight gain was inevitable, it's just I am deciding to do it sooner rather than later, and with an exit plan! One silver lining, kind of, is that because I was 70kg less than a year ago, I didn't chuck out any of my larger clothes, so I won't have to suffer the pain of going shopping for 'fat' clothes again lol!

Food wise I think I am doing pretty well. I don't eat fast food, and eat a lot of whole grains, lean meat, healthy fats (i.e. avocado), heaps of vegetables, dairy etc. I think at the moment it is just the amount of everything... How important is it to hit the 40/30/30 macros during reset? Because I struggle to get my carbs down....
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12-17-2013, 01:24 AM
Post: #4
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
Also is it possible to experience extreme hunger AND the fatigue phases of reset at the same time lol?

One good thing, I think, is that I definitely seem to finally be improving in the amount of weight I can lift. Previously I've struggled along on the same old weights not getting better, but all of a sudden I have had weight increase after increase. Some of it is probably mental, but surely not all of it...my personal trainer even noticed that my left arm, which was usually so much weaker than my right that it looked like I had suffered a palsy of some sort mid workout, is now pretty much keeping up with my right arm. Surely that's got to be good!
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12-17-2013, 06:06 PM
Post: #5
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
I'm glad I ddin't panic yesterday and just stuck with it, because that kilo that appeared yesterday disappeared this morning. Not that I don't fully expect to gain some more, but that was a little too fast for comfort!
Still very hungry, ended up around 2700 calories yesterday - this seems to be the amount my body is satisfied with. Any less and I tend to binge and then end up at like, 3500!

Still ridiculously tired too. I could nap all day.
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12-17-2013, 09:34 PM
Post: #6
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
(12-17-2013 01:24 AM)lucy1984 Wrote:  Also is it possible to experience extreme hunger AND the fatigue phases of reset at the same time lol?

It definetly is possible! It could WHAT your eating! Some foods do make you feel fatigued. Also, if it's winter where you live, it could the time of year! FOR ME, Too many white Carbs and sugar in one meal can put me in a coma! drooling

Joan
Be yourself. Everyone else is taken! kiss

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/jaeone
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12-18-2013, 02:22 AM
Post: #7
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
Definitely not Winter - mid Summer! But I'm in Australia, so that would do it.

Hmm, I'll keep an eye on what I'm eating and see if there's any correlation.....I don't tend to eat white carbs, just good dense grainy breads...and sugar not too much of that either. Usually only the occasional treat..

For now I'll just put it down to my body being busy putting all the extra energy and nutrients to good use, such as building muscle and everything else that has probably wasted away from years of dieting!
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12-18-2013, 08:20 PM
Post: #8
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
I had my run through of my new weights program at the gym today. I got him to do it in 2 sections for me - a lower and upper body day. The reps he has me doing on some of them are higher than recommended on EM2WL, but seriously, we only did a set of each exercise today, to show me how to do them, and I was struggling to finish. So I think I'll leave worrying about how heavy my heavy lifting is at least until I get through 6-10 weeks of this bad boy of a program....

I plan on going to the gym 3 times a week - so alternating the arms and legs, plus I'll keep going to my personal trainer, and just get her to alternate between legs and arms. The stuff I do with her will be lighter and more high rep, but it can't hurt to mix it up...


The reset is definitely a mental game. SO much self doubt - what if I am the one in 100 person it doesn't work for? What if I never stop being ravenously hungry? What if I never stop gaining? How will I ever eat the cut amount when I regularly go over my reset TDEE? I know there is no point worrying about them, and I try not to give too much time to these thoughts, but they do pop up regularly.
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12-20-2013, 08:29 PM
Post: #9
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
I did my first 'lower body' workout at the gym this morning. Took about an hour, and I missed one machine because I couldn't remember how to use it...
Basically it was: kettle bell swings followed by a squat/press thingy, 4 and 8 kg, 3 sets 15
crunches, 3 sets of 20
leg press, 45 kilos, 3 sets of 25
sit ups, 3 sets of 15
multi-planar lunges - 15 each side, body weight, 2 sets
Russian twist? With a 2kg ball, 3 sets of 15
Smith machine? Basically squats with a bar, 10kg, 3 sets of 15
Um...some sort of spinal bridge thing (lie on back and hold up the pelvis and torso) 3 sets of 60s
Bosu ball squats, 3 sets of 15

Also I went out for dinner with friends last night, and for the first time I didn't stress out about how many calories.
Which was good, as it was Greek Mezza, and impossible to work out calories. And also followed by Banoffe pie...

Usually the whole time I'm eating dessert I feel too guilty to really enjoy it, but this time I just ate it and enjoyed it! My weight was up 2 kg this morning, but I am pretty sure that it is near impossible to gain 2kg of fat over night, so more likely it's water retention, and eating later than usual.
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12-22-2013, 05:59 PM
Post: #10
RE: Reset, cut and beyond!
Sigh. OK this is getting tough mentally.

Still eating like a horse, wondering whether I will ever stop being starving and just go back to a normal appetite. Doubting whether I will ever see the appetite suppression stage.

The 2kg I was up on the scales on Saturday is still here, starting to worry that it is true weight gain....which means my weight gain still hasn't stabilised. And with Christmas starting, well, basically tomorrow, I am only going to see more weight increases.

I am feeling hot and uncomfortable, being now 8kg up from my minimum weight in the middle of Summer is unpleasant. I can't bring myself to go for my runs, as my legs feel too big and uncomfortable now and my arms are starting to chafe.

The only thing that is getting me through is reminding myself 'short term pain for long term gain', but it is hard when I still have doubts that this process will work, and I'll end up having to diet the weight off.

I know part of the problem is that I am eating SO much - well above my TDEE indicated for the reset. I think after the Christmas food onslaught, I am going to really reeeeaaalllly try to stick to 2500 calories per day, to try and give myself a chance to see maintenance.

Anyway....
I did my upper body workout yesterday, and I am trying to focus on positives, such as my obviously bigger biceps. Which I keep flexing for my husband, who was suitably impressed the first time, but I think a bit over it now!
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