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In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
03-17-2014, 02:47 PM
Post: #1
Sad In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
This is going to be long, but please bear with me. I originally came across this plan while on a search to try to justify my low calorie eating. I'm 5'3", and since I am so short I figured it must take much less to fuel myself. However, in all the reading I did, I found absolutely nothing credible to back that thought process up, so here I am on a metabolism reset, hoping to heal myself and get back to a normal weight while enjoying eating. In the past I had great success with the Dukan diet and quickly lost a ton of weight. I have since turned to vegetarianism and I don't think I could ever go back to eating meat, so Dukan is no longer a viable option (there are instructions for being a vegetarian on it, but they're ludicrously limiting, and I could never do it). The turn to vegetarianism has had the unfortunate side effect of causing me to gain a lot of weight, but I've been determined to find a way to make it work for me. I see so many skinny vegetarians around that it's heartbreaking to me that I can't seem to be one of them.

So, issue number 1: I am finding it insanely hard to reach these protein goals as a vegetarian. I'm lactose intolerant, and so unless I feel like hurting, dairy is out. All the protein options I have also seem to be heavy in carbs and/or fat, so it seems like I am extremely limited in my food choices because of the ratios of carbs and fat already in my proteins! I have been supplementing with Vega Protein recovery powder, but even that's not usually enough to get me past 25% unless I only eat protein all day! I'm wondering if it's really and truly necessary for me to eat that much protein in order to see results, or if there are other macros that might better serve me.

Issue number 2: I HATE lifting weights. Hate hate hate hate hate! I have taken weight training classes, so I have a pretty good idea of what I'm doing in the weight room. I still find it dreary, boring, and repetitive, and that there's no mind-body connection, just "I lift this. Ungh!". That said, I'm no fan of regular cardio, either. Running on a treadmill makes me feel like a hamster on a wheel. The main forms of exercise I am drawn to and truly enjoy are Vinyasa yoga and belly dancing. I am actually a part-time yoga teacher, and I do feel like the yoga I practice involves a lot more strength training than the haybales spreadsheet seems to give yoga credit for. I've been trying to incorporate a little weight lifting once or twice a week on top of the yoga and belly dance, but every time, I feel like I'm lugging myself to the gym and finding it incredibly hard to stay motivated to keep doing it. I'm wondering if I can just count my yoga as my strength training, since it involves so much isometric strength work?

Issue number 3: I am nearing the end of 8 weeks on my reset. I did expect to gain a little weight, but I wasn't expecting to gain so much so quickly. I started out at 135 pounds, and as of this morning I am now 145 pounds. Most of my clothes no longer fit me; I'm having to dig through and only wear my stretchiest, most forgiving items, which is beyond frustrating. I'm feeling fat, ugly, and misshapen. I'm wondering how I am to know if I'm just gaining water weight, or if I'm actually eating too much and just getting fat? Or if my calories are ok, but because my macros are a little off, I am just gaining fat? I have been steadily eating at about 1913 calories a day, sometimes more (up to around 2100 on some extra hungry days), this number is based on my starting weight and activity levels entered into the haybales spreadsheet. Since I've been having trouble getting to the 30% protein, my macros have usually been right around 25% protein, 30% fat, and 45% carbs. Could this be my downfall? If I'm unable to get to the correct macros, should I just give up and go for something else entirely? I am also wondering if I should start my cut or go for another month or so on the reset? I honestly cannot afford to be buying new clothes to accomodate any more of a (hopefully) temporary gain though, so spending more time on the reset is causing me a great deal of worry. And if I do start my cut, should I cut based on the weight I currently am, or the weight I started at?

I'm feeling a bit at the end of my rope here. If I gain any more weight I'll have to be walking around in the nude! I'm really just wondering if this plan can actually work for me, since I am a lactose intolerant vegetarian that absolutely despises traditional weight lifting. I started off hopeful that I could finally fix the endless cycle of dieting and just be, without having to be plus-sized, but I'm finding that it's just not the case with this plan so far. I'm counting and measuring everything incessantly to try to get to these impossible macros, and finding that I'm eating really unbalanced meals, and skipping on healthy items like fruits and vegetables just so I can attempt to reach these goals! I can't imagine doing this for the rest of my life, there's got to be a better way!

Thanks in advance for all of your wisdom and assistance! I am really hoping I can find a way to make this plan work for me!
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03-18-2014, 01:26 PM
Post: #2
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
Sounds like you are having a difficult time. I can completely sympathize as I am 5'2" and also gained 10 pounds on my reset, except I began at 143 and am now 153. Most of my clothes are not fitting me ether and I feel very discouraged.

I hope you get some good advice on here but I would say since you have not begun your cut yet, why not give it a whirl? I know beginning a cut all depends on how long you had been underrating. So if you were not eating really low calorie diets for long before it seems 8 weeks should be long enough for reset and you can go into a modest cut, 10-15%. You are to base your cut on your current weight. If you ate a very low calorie diet for years you may need to give your body more time to adjust to the process and eat at TDEE for a longer period. After you cut you are to take a break every 4-6 weeks. There is a current article on that in this blog. This is to keep your body from lowering its TDEE to your cut level of calories.

I will allow somebody else more equipped to answer about the protein and lifting. I also struggle with getting enough protein in pretty much everyday and am wondering if that is why my cut has not been successful so far. There is a member named Emma on here and she is vegan. Prehaps she can help you with that. I know dark greens and legumes have protein. Do you eat eggs?

Good luck. I hope you get some support here.
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03-18-2014, 05:51 PM
Post: #3
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
rlm0031 is right about the break and the cut.

As for protein, I'm not vegan/vegitarian, so I can't help with that. I struggle as a meat eater to get all my protein in, and I also eat a bunch of dairy, which doesn't help you at all. Peanut butter. It's my go to when I need more protein or more calories for the day.

Lifting. I say give it a shot. I wasn't sure it would be for me when I started (I didn't want to be a "meat head"...). I love Yoga and understand what you mean when you want that body/movement connection. I can honestly say that I get that when I lift. And I lift heavy. You have to be thinking about your body position, the way you are moving the weight, and the muscles that are enabling you to move that big heavy piece of metal. I am in love with lifting and miss it when I can't get to the gym. There are other ways to increase your resistance like kettlebells and some of those moves are more "yoga" in design. Look into Lauren Brooks and some of her programs. Watch her "how to" videos. It might be something you are interested in. I wouldn't close your mind to lifting until you have actually tried a few programs and maybe approached them in a more "yoga/body connection" sort of way happy
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03-18-2014, 07:46 PM (This post was last modified: 03-18-2014 07:50 PM by Kiki.)
Post: #4
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
Hey ladies!

Another shorty here, so I feel your pain. I've gone through the reset and cut, and bulk and cut, and everything in between, so I "get" the weight gain and how it can affect your mind. I always say that tall peeps have all the luck because at least the weight spreads out, lol. We have nowhere to grow but OUT. EEK.

I'm 5'2, and usually around 145-150 during bulk, and 135-140ish after cut.

Anyway wink

As for being a vegan, the recommendation is actually to increase your protein intake by about 10%, due to the different absorption rate of animal vs veg proteins. Don't beat yourself up for "only" hitting 25% though, that's great! applause Remember that this isn't an overnight thing. If you happen to go over a bit on your fats when hitting protein, that's ok. Especially if they're good fats. wink...Just start where you are, you don't have to become an instant protein head. I still have to "focus" to hit my protein goals (not a huge meat eater by nature)..

I will say that your cals sounded pretty low to me (being as we have similar stats), so I'm not sure about the #, but it could be on the account of the yoga.

That being said, it goes to show that it works for ANY one, regardless of activity, because of that fact that it's based on each individuals personal stats. Often we'd like to *think* that we're the special person that it *doesn't* work for, lol. Because it gives us reason to ditch the process and go back to the familiar. wink

Sorry, girl. It works for everyone, but it's not a 12 week quick fix plan. Sad If anything, our downfall comes from the "watching and waiting" that we're prone to do. This WILL work. You have to know that and live like it. I know...easier said than done. But sitting around waiting is like watching grass grow. It's painstaking, and you can't really expect to see it. The results are a sum of the total. Not a day to day event. Changes are happening every day, you have to keep pushing in the right direction. Every time you doubt or take a step back, you prolong it. (just trust me on that one)

We've all been there. It's freakin nerve.wrecking. But if it wasn't, would you really appreciate when you DO see results? If it were easy, everyone would do it. The reason why we typically have so much "success" on former diets is because they only last a limited time. Having to stick something out, that's where the real strength lies. I see so many people, put in a good 6 months - get frustrated and walk away. They go back to whatever "worked" before, but inevitably end up right. back. here. a year or two later. Tell me, who got further? The person who stuck it out another 1,2, or even 6 months, and actually SEES results? or the person who put in 6 months, quits, and spends the next year still in search of the next big thing?

You gotta plant your feet solidly on *one* side of the fence. No turning back wink

You will find, without a doubt that those who have the most success are those that stick it out. Meaning they've felt EVERYthing that you feel now, and kept going. There's a reason why our most drastic success stories are those that have been at this for over a year. While reading the story and seeing the pics, it may seem as if it all happened magically, but it didn't. These ladies went for MONTHS without seeing any signs of success, but changes were happening along. Changes that they would've ultimately never saw if they didn't trust. and wait.

As for the lifting...lol...you know I love my weights, but I'm an equal opportunity exerciser, lol. I say do what you love. As long as you understand WHY you do it, and the results that will come from it (and are satisfied with them) then go for it. I work with many ladies who love the treadmill and never want to touch a barbell in their lives, and ladies who don't wanna be caught dead doing ANY cardio. As long as the Iron Heads know not to expect to run any marathons, and the cardio bunnies don't expect to look like fitness model...we're good. happy

So the workouts that you do, really depend on the look that you want, and the long term results that you desire. I think that every routine should contain a healthy mix of both. If you're saying that lifting is "boring" and repetitious, then perhaps you've only discovered one type of lifting? If you love Yoga, then what about workouts like "You are your own gym" that use body weight training or combining your strength/yoga days? You could do a quick Metabolic circuit type lift for 10-15 minutes or so, then "reward" yourself with a great yoga/belly dance session after?

I wouldn't give up on weights just yet, but keep trying new things to find your preferred "style" - so that you can get all the benefits of BOTH yoga and resistance training?

As you get older, the resistance training will become more important. I see ladies all the time that are/were strict pilates/yoga enthusiasts, that thought they'd NEVER enjoy resistance training, become full converts. Not saying that YOU will. But just keep an open mind.

I'm a firm believer that your routine should be full of stuff you love and would never want to give up, but have a healthy sprinkling of stuff you *need* (for desired physique/health goals)

I wouldn't really count the yoga as strength unless it's newer poses that you haven't mastered yet. At the beginning, most moves can be considered strength, but once you've mastered them they tend to move into endurance territory. So finding newer ways of creating leverage and challenge will be key. big grin (which is why I mention the YAYOG book to find some moves to incorporate)

Kiki (aka rambling )
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03-19-2014, 12:02 PM
Post: #5
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
Hi and welcome! I'm the aforementioned vegan on the forum, so I thought I'd chime in happy But first, I agree with Kiki about the weights. Maybe consider giving another form of weight lifting a shot before you write it off, because it is so beneficial for body change. Hours and hours and hours of cardio are not holding a candle to a fraction of the time spent in the gym doing primarily heavy lifting. And for me, there is an aspect that has helped/still helps me: even if the scale isn't moving, measurements don't seem to be moving, etc and I doubt what I am doing, I KNOW that regardless of all of those things, lifting weights is still improving me - my physique, my muscle mass, my strength. So if nothing else, good things are still happening, and that's comforting (esp in the beginning).

So about the protein. I aim for 130 g a day and often I don't make it and I attribute that to the fact that I am in my cut phase so just have less calories to play with in general. Because yes, its a little more challenging for us but not impossible. However, I can easily get to 100 grams at least. I incorporate into my diet:

tofu
tempeh
seitan (homemade)
edamame
lentils
all types of beans
soy milk
organic pumpkin seed protein powder
organic rice protein powder
breads made of a combo of the following: chickpea flour, soy flour, vital wheat gluten

I generally do 1 shake a day with the rice protein powder and may or may not throw some pumpkin seed protien powder in a soup or salad or a bowl - its pretty tasteless so can go in anything. Otherwise, I eat whole foods and like to change up my protein sources. I do not tend to eat a lot of additional starchy carbs because there are carbs in a lot of these sources. Fats I don't worry about. They are healthy fats and keep me full, and I really don't see the harm in going over (and its rare that I do anyway).

In addition to the above: look into Butler soy curls. They are awesome and the family-owned company is great to deal with. Another is Beyond Meat. There has been a lot of media attention given to Beyond Meat lately. Its a chicken substitute that is soy and pea protein based. You can pronounce all the ingredients and its extremely close to chicken in taste and texture. Alton Brown and Mark Bittman both were fooled, and the founder of Twitter and Bill Gates have both recently invested in the company.

Feel free to ask away should you have questions.
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03-19-2014, 08:58 PM
Post: #6
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
Hi siobhanenator, and welcome!

I use Vega products. The Recovery (4g protein) for post work only to replenish potassium, and for actual protein I use their Vega One powder (15g). If I'm really under, I'll sometimes have 1.5-2 scoops. Their One bars also have 15g of protein and are a great on the go snack. I always keep one in my purse.

To echo everyone else, give the process time. One of the benefits of working through the challenges and frustrations, is that you learn so much about your body. We didn't gain the weight overnight, so don't expect your body to just let go of the weight after putting it through so much over the years.

The information, advice, and stories shared on this forum are so valuable! You'll figure it out! big grin
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03-24-2014, 05:55 PM
Post: #7
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
Thanks for all the advice! I decided to go on my cut, and I've also started using the You Are Your Own Gym App. I'm not really crazy about it yet, but at least I feel like I'm doing something a little more engaging than just lifting things. Lifting weights in the gym makes me go through an existential crisis every time!

I'm actually not a vegan, just a lactose intolerant vegetarian. I still eat eggs (sourced from a friend who has pet chickens big grin), but eggs are surprisingly lower in protein than you'd think. Only 6 grams of protein in an egg! I do eat most of the proteins suggested here, but again, they're all very high in carbs and I just cannot eat anything but those items if I want to try to reach a 30% protein goal. The Vega powder I use has 26 grams of protein, which helps, but still trying to get to even 100 grams of protein in a day (which isn't 30% for me) is virtually impossible unless I just skip on everything that isn't a protein. I could do that in the short term, but if this is supposed to be a plan for life, no thanks! I'd also prefer not to use any powders or highly processed foods at all. I feel bad enough using the Vega powder, I'd really rather just get my protein from whole, minimally processed sources. After reading some vegan/vegetarian body building diet plans elsewhere on the web, I decided to just go down to 15-20% protein as a goal. Maybe that's a no-no here, but I cannot see sticking to anything long term if my diet keeps me from eating fruits and vegetables.

I hate to sound so whiny, but I still feel like I'm fighting for my sanity here. Hopefully with these little adjustments that will change soon. I am not a person of blind faith by nature, and if I have nothing quantifiable to go on that shows this is actually working, I'm not sure how much longer I can stick with this. Generic "good things happening" are all fine and good if you can actually tell they're there, but if my weight, body fat, and measurements are just going up exponentially, I cannot just sit by and console myself that it's all fine as I get bigger and bigger. I wasn't very big to start off with, I just wanted to get a lower body fat percentage than where I was. So far, the only thing I've done is make my body fat percentage increase! And maybe the weight didn't come on overnight, but gaining 10 pounds of solid fat in 2 months, solely because of this program, is close enough to that. If I could lose 10 pounds that quickly it would be great...so when does the losing part start happening? Even after nearly a week on my cut I haven't noticed a decrease of any sort.
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03-24-2014, 06:35 PM (This post was last modified: 03-24-2014 06:45 PM by Kiki.)
Post: #8
RE: In my reset, having a ton of issues...Need help and encouragement!
Hey again! Sorry that you're feeling so stressed about this. Don't worry about being "whiny" lol...we've all had a good whine over it tongue

I totally understand. Like I said, we've all been there. And I completely get that's of little comfort to hear "trust the process" because honestly, NONE of us really are a blind faith person by nature. It's freakin hard to trust when (we think that) nothing is there. But this is one of those things that if you don't stick it out to see for yourself, you honestly won't ever believe it.

If you've seen the "what to expect" section here or in the Starter Kit, then you know that I recommend not even starting if you can't stick it out. Sounds crazy, but I'm serious -- because then, quite frankly, you will have gained for nothing. I don't want anyone to come through, gain weight and quit/walk away without seeing the other side of things. I tell everyone I know to be FULLY convinced before diving in. You have to know from the jump that you WILL want to quit, you WILL have bad days and days where it seems like it's all for nothing. But if you stop there, you'll never reap the benefits. The changes that will occur are from a compounding of choice that you make day in and out. If you aren't really "behind" what you're doing, then you'll (or any of us for that matter) will not really have reason to continue when the going gets tough. Which is most definitely will.

We've been conditioned to believe -- by all of our attempts at other diets, smartphones, drive thru food, and high speed internet that if we don't see things in what we *feel* is "enough" time, then it's not "working." Or we want to keep changing things up because doing the same mundane thing day-in-and-out seems like it's not good enough to bring the result we want.

You're a vegetarian...think of how many of those gorgeous fruits and veggies that would NOT exist if farmers felt the way that we do. wink You tear that land up, give it all the compost and fertilization goodness that it needs... then you plant, you water, and you wait. LOL. (ok not that simple, but you know what I'm saying).

I find in most clients, that their attitude toward the process is directly related to the length the process takes. It's not that you need to have a fake "rosy" outlook and pretend like you LOVE gaining weight. ummm...no one loves gaining weight. But the point is that the difference between those who have success and those who don't... is not that big of a difference at all. They both hate the exact same parts of the process. Successful peeps stick with it anyway, and unsuccessful don't. Successful people don't really have that much more faith in the beginning...but they develop strength from pushing past the unsuccessful moments until they begin to shrink in comparison.

I know this personally, because I sat right where you are. I sat and watched other people talk about how the process worked. I dipped my toe in a few times, and ran away EVERY time at the sight of trouble. It took me YEARS of watching other people get results while I tried to prove that I didn't "need" to do it this way before finally throwing my hands up in frustration and giving in completely to the process. By that time, people that I'd originally started the process with had success results 10xs mine. But I'm hard headed like that, and tend to have to hit a brick wall before "trusting"...I honestly hope that you are not like me, lol. But I totally get that everyone must come to grip with things in their own time, and from their own circumstance. No one here can make you stick it out if you don't believe that it will work. We can only tell you how we got to the point of belief.

Your own *why* has to be greater than your *how* or else it will always stand in the way.

This process can and will work for anyone willing to work it. But I've learned that not everyone is willing to, and I respect that. It's always your option. And we're certainly here for you if you want the help big grin

Seeing as all of your posts appear that you have "one foot out the door" and are causing you much suffering...you may want to really take a step back and decide if this is something you're willing to go through. If the end justifies the means for you.

If it doesn't, then it's perfectly acceptable to really wait until you can get behind this and then come back to it later (if at all). We don't desire for anyone to live this process in misery.

This journey is supposed to be about taking your life *back* from "diets" that make you miserable wink

On that note, I'll leave you with this NSV that was recently posted:
Quote:braves1girl: "Ok y'all, I've been contemplating back and forth about posting this, but I'm just gonna put it out there...I started EM2WL (seriously this time, as I wasn't consistent with it in the past) on 2/17/14. I have lost 4 lbs in 5 wks (today) and 6.5 inches all with eating 1900-2100 cals/day!!! It's so freakin amazing to me but it's real! I am doing Muscle Max DVD by Cathe Fredreich (I always misspell her last name, so sorry if it is this time). I just started doing the DVD 3 days/wk last week. AND I was just doing the upper body only part due to knee problems. I will admit, there were times where I questioned myself and the process. If it weren't for Anitrasoto cheering me on and reading ANewLucia's posts on her progress with her cut after a very long "bulk" (eating at her TDEE), I would've gone back to my old ways of eating a very low calorie diet, screwing up my metabolism, losing my hair, being a b*^ch, etc.. I know this is a slow process, but I also know that when I reach my goal (and I've got a LONG way to go) it will stay off because I'm eating/living a lifestyle that I can sustain for the rest of my life. Just wanted to share...thanks for listening. And a very big thanks to Anitrasoto and ANewLucia and EM2WL group moderators for sharing your knowledge with me! "

Kiki (aka rambling )
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