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Fueling Life
07-06-2017, 10:14 AM
Post: #81
RE: Fueling Life
Hey everyone,

I'm still resetting, my data is boringly steady so I haven't been updating much.
I've reset for 13 weeks now, and I'm on my 14th week. The averages over the past 13 weeks have been 2175 kcals, a BW of 56,9 kg and exercise of 5 hours a week, all with barely any fluctuations.
Lifting is fun, but I do feel like I'm stalling. I seem to have run into a sticky spot with my squat (70 kg x 5 is still HARD and I failed in my second set yesterday), so I'm hoping more pause squats, goblet squats, front squats etc will help. I feel like my balance is too far forward when squating the 70 kg, and I'm trying to practice my 3rd world squat as that is the advice you find online. Maybe it is simply too heavy.
My row is going up though (yay!), yesterday I hit 42 kg x 8 x 3.
I'm still running and biking as well, and loving it. happy I need to pay more attention to when I do my long runs, and it is often the day before I would like to squat heavy. Obviously running long distances will impede my strength, but somehow I find it difficult to coordinate lol.
The practical, hectic portion of my trial (doctorate related) is over at the end of July. So starting at the beginning of August, when I have less stress, I'll probably start a cut.This would put my reset at around 16-18 weeks, which I think will be enough from what I've read.
Of course, a lot of you understand that I'm loathe to eat ONLY 1800 kcals big grinD We'll see have I deal wink
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09-18-2017, 08:40 AM
Post: #82
RE: Fueling Life
Hello, sorry for not posting in a while!
I reset for about 17 weeks and then tried at cut at 1850-1900 kcal and didn't really lose during the 5 weeks. It was stressful eating at a lower calorie amount. Since then I've gone back to maintenance for 2 weeks, and haven't tracked for the last 2 weeks.
It actually feels good to not track!
It has been ages, literally, since I have not tracked for more than a week at a time. Usually I can't stand not knowing how my macros are, if I hit my protein etc. But I'm really enjoying this break from tracking, and I think my body is too. I've definitely been eating enough, and it's been averaging 56,2-56,1 kg for the past 4-5 weeks of being back at maintenance.

Looking at that paragraph, I'm incredibly happy that I've achieved something that I sought to do with this reset. I've reset my mindset. I'm currently eating what I want, whenever I want, and I'm okay with my weight. I'm not obsessive anymore, and I'm comfortable in my skin. I don't have a constant nag in the back of my mind to either restrict, or binge.
Sure, losing some fat would be okay, but I'm at a healthy weight, and I think my body just wants to sit at this high calorie maintenance, and this weight for now. And I'm okay with that.

Thank you EM2WL for the support and for being a such a great platform for becoming balanced in mind and body!
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09-18-2017, 09:42 AM
Post: #83
RE: Fueling Life
OMG, Jules!!!!!

Your post just gave me goosebumps! I cannot even tell you how happy you made me. This is what we talk about, being free and happy where you are! That doesn't mean you don't want things to change and improve, but that is the perfect starting point!!!! You just crossed a huge bridge (make sure to burn it and never look back!).

Thank you so much for sharing this. Would you mind if we share it with the fam?

And, I don't know if you seen it yet, but there's a 5 day free Crush the Diet Bootcamp starting this Wednesday, make sure to join: http://www.crushthediet.com . You can do watch the vids at your own time. Trust me, it will be amazing!

Tereza Toledobig grin lovestruck
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Here is my journey: http://eatmore2weighless.com/tereza/
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09-25-2017, 04:24 AM
Post: #84
RE: Fueling Life
Thanks for the support Tereza!

If you like, sure.

Thanks for the link, I'll look into it.
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09-25-2017, 08:03 AM
Post: #85
RE: Fueling Life
Yay, Jules! Thanks!

Make sure to check it, there are still 2 days left, but you can join at any time. Also there will be an email with recap afterwards. Totally worth it!

Tereza Toledobig grin lovestruck
Team EM2WL
Certified EM2WL Personal Trainer and Coach
Here is my journey: http://eatmore2weighless.com/tereza/
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12-18-2017, 05:33 PM
Post: #86
RE: Fueling Life
Hi Jules, it was great to see you post on Sheila's thread - I had been wondering how you were going. I often just read rather than post also. I just wanted to say hi. :-)
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12-21-2017, 11:13 AM
Post: #87
RE: Fueling Life
Hi Fiona! happy
I'm doing okay. I've been struggling with body image a bit, but it's probably caused by imbalanced eating. I've been not tracking since September, and though it feels freeing, I'm probably not hitting my protein goals, and thus I'm eating too much stuff that doesn't actually fill me up. It's nice to have the freedom of going for a cinnamon roll when I feel like, but it sometimes causes me to overindulge later because I get hungry sooner. If that makes any sense?
Weightwise I'm in the same ballpark I have been, but going on a cut often crosses my mind. Realistically, it's just not what I should do. I'm at a normal weight, and in the past couple of years after my ED, cuts have just be counterproductive (I barely lose, I'm unhappy, and when going back to maintenance I gain back extra, for no apparent reason). I think my body just is not comfortable losing, and I need to learn to respect that.

I've been training consistently, and that helps a lot with feeling comfortable in my body. Our bodies can do amazing things, and I love the feeling of progress! For example, although my goal would have been to hit 10 pull ups this year, I am still very proud of the 8 that I can do. I wouldn't have thought I could do that when I began strength training. I'm still running as well, and I will begin training soon for a race in March.

I've been searching for a job after my thesis, and it's a new process for me. There is a rollercoaster of emotions every time another job prospect catches my eye (nervousness, elatedness, anxiety, disappointment, etc. depending on the stage, lol). I'm practicing awareness and trying to overcome urges to turn to food when I'm dealing with this stress. It's definitely a work in progress wink

That was probably more than you wanted to know! big grin hope you're doing okay too!
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12-21-2017, 05:22 PM
Post: #88
RE: Fueling Life
(12-21-2017 11:13 AM)Jules Wrote:  It's nice to have the freedom of going for a cinnamon roll when I feel like, but it sometimes causes me to overindulge later because I get hungry sooner. If that makes any sense?

Makes perfect sense to me. When my carbs go higher, I'm a lot hungrier, even with more calories. When I eat more fat and adequate protein, I'm much more satisfied.
I've tweaked my macros for this reason - 30% carbs, 40% fats. Yum yum.
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12-22-2017, 05:39 AM
Post: #89
RE: Fueling Life
I really liked reading your update Jules. It is real and it does seem like you are making progress in being consistent with exercise, being aware that you are struggling with body image and the probable reason, not allowing ed thinking to take hold and holding steady despite all the ups and downs of searching for a job. Keeping your weight consistent is great - could it be that you are gaining muscle and ditching fat as you become stronger?

I am doing ok but would still like to ditch around 4kgs of fat to be back to my happy size. My body doesn't let me cut unless it is ready so this is where I am hoping the tapping will make a difference - if I can lower my cortisol levels or get rid of some emotional baggage I am hoping my body will just naturally release some fat.

Eight pull-ups - that is great. I have been really happy to be doing 7-8 pull-ups lately and out of the blue I did 10 this morning!! Woohoo! You may still hit 10 this year - there are a few days left but even if you don't 8 is really impressive.

Is there a specific job you are looking/hoping for or are you just seeing what comes up?
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12-22-2017, 11:59 AM
Post: #90
RE: Fueling Life
Jules, we are all a work in progress. Just ok going. 8 pull-ups is amazing! Yes, staying consisten with your lifting does help in all other areas of your life. It does make you stronger, not only physically, but mentally as well.

Race in March? How exciting!

Finding a job can definitely be a rollercoaster of emotions!

Tereza Toledobig grin lovestruck
Team EM2WL
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Here is my journey: http://eatmore2weighless.com/tereza/
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